2 Arrows

Buddha was once asked by one of his monks, long ago you taught us that there is suffering and there is a reason for suffering which is Desire and there is an end of suffering which is Nirvana and also there is a way out of suffering which is Ashtanga Marg. But now we find we all are following your teachings, but we are all getting old, we are getting disease and also death is coming near, not only for us but for you also. That means suffering is continuing even though we are following your teachings, what is your message and how does it work.

 Buddha gave a very nice and incisive answer as to what spirituality is. Consider a man hit by an arrow, imagine the sudden shock and pain and the suffering. Imagine that he is hit by a second arrow immediately, how much more suffering that increases. Now, the first arrow is the suffering that the world throws at us, the things that happens in the world like death, disease and social problems, financial problems, relationship problems, health problems and so on, all of the events which happen in the world which give us suffering. The Second arrow which hits is our reaction to all of this, how do we take all this and it is the second arrow which really causes the maximum amount of suffering. What happens in the world can be pleasant or unpleasant but really that is not the cause of suffering, the real cause is the second arrow. Our reaction to the events of the world, how do we react to the problems, crisis, disease, death etc. So the nature of suffering is like being hit by 2 Arrows, one arrow is what the world throws at us and the second arrow is how we react to it, its the second that contains suffering. 

Then the Buddha says all that I have taught and all that spirituality can do is remove that suffering which is caused by the second arrow. Pleasant and unpleasant events coming from the world, they will keep coming, they have come for everybody, all living beings, all human beings including enlightened beings, but they were able to overcome suffering. There is a famous incident, Sri Ramakrishna is dying of throat cancer, and is very sick and suffering terribly, one of his disciples asked how are you today? Sri Ramakrishna says he's not well, there is pain here and cannot eat, then the disciple said Sir I see you are at great Bliss, a strange thing to say to a man dying of terminal cancer. Sri Ramakrishna acknowledges it, he laughs and says 'O sala dhore niyeche' (the Rascal has found me out). Outside he is suffering but deep inside he has got something established from which there is no suffering, he is completely fine. That's the difference between an enlightened person and normal person, that's the difference between the Yogi and the Bhogi.

Sri Ramakrishna said that life is full of thorns, the wise person will put on shoes so that he can walk over the thorns without being affected. What is these shoes, this spiritual realization are the shoes which we must put on to walk through the pathways of life, which is full of challenges, full of sufferings. We must put on the shoes of spirituality to protect ourselves from the thorns of life.

Happiness PEP talk

Happiness is the sum of Pleasure(P), Engagement(E) and Purpose(P)

Pleasure

Please can be defined as any material, physical thing that we experience. It makes you happy at that point of time, but gradually we are not able to find the exact same happiness that we experienced for the very first time. Like when eat something good, it gives immense happiness, if we continue eating or overeat, our happiness will vanish and next time we will want variety of it. Same way when you buy a new mobile, 1 or 2 years later you find it old as there is a new variety or model that came into picture. Similarly you will not go to the same destination for every vacation, however beutiful the place may be, you not enjoy the same Joke that once made you laugh. Pleasure brings happiness but non lasting, once it goes away you become upset. If you single mindedly chase pleasure very soon you will find nothing pleasing you anymore.

Engagement

Engagement is getting involved in the things you like doing, it can be a hobby or profession or anything else. If you do what you like you are very much satisfied, and its more sustainable, more fulfilling. For example if you are watching an international cricket or football match, it gives you happiness from inside. At the same time if you go out and play the sport, it will give you more satisfaction, however bad you may play. Watching is passive consumption, doing is active engagement. So engagement gives more happiness than pleasure.

Purpose

Finding the meaning of life is the purpose of life. Thakur Sri Ramakrishna said, you can add as many zeros(0) as you want, but if the one(1) is absent, all the accumulated zeros become valueless.  He is pointing to all the things in the world as zeros and asking us to find the One. The One that we are searching, are inside us only, but we are trying to find it outside. We are searching on the wrong side. As per Vedas I am Satcitananda  (eternal existence), I am Chaitanya(eternal consciousness) also I am Ananda Swarup(eternal happiness). Now look I am atman inside, but we search fulfillment outside, you can never find it outside. Atman is continuous bliss and the highest bliss. We get most of the happiness from Atman. Analogy is- the objects or things that makes me happy we want to keep it, preserve it, never let that thing go, like we buy the things we like. Similarly the thing that makes me unhappy or unsatisfied we try to let that go away like our old computer, mobile. Now think, if we want to keep something, hold on to it forever, then that thing must be giving happiness to us like our parents, family, friends. We all say I want to live, let me be. If this is true then why people commit suicide, why they want to finish their lives. If we ask a suicidal person that we are fixing all your problems, it will be gone forever, do you still want to die? the answer will always be NO, I want to live. As such we don't hate ourselves. I am the continuous source of happiness and maximum source of happiness. Now see I and Atman is all same, the ONE.

3 great powers of Mind

1. Decision

Krishna said in Gita we all have the power to say NO to the evil thought that come to our mind. These evil thoughts are anger and rage. When you face a critical situation which makes you angry and tells you to act like that, STOP. Close the door and windows, don't give it a chance to pass through your emotions. There is a small window of opportunity, when the reaction bubble up within us before expressing in speech or before taking action there is a small window(of time) where we can accept that or reject that. We can bypass the anger, rage and replace it with more skillful thoughts and ideas. 

Like when there is a craving for something fancy(food, clothes, gadgets, social media etc.) you have the ability to say NO to it. The word decision comes from a Greek word which means scissor, to cut. Swami Vivekananda said, Once the sleeping soul is awakened or roused to conscious action, goodness will come, power will come, glory will come. Krishna says in Gita, take care of your thoughts, the words are taken care. Take care of your words, the actions are taken care. It may be difficult at the beginning. 

Exercise- Consciously follow the thoughts that come to your mind. When you get a negative thought put a black pebble inside the jar and when a good thought comes put a white pebble. Initially the count of blacks may be more than whites. Eventually if you practice it, gradually the black pebbles will be reduced and you will only have good thoughts. 

2. Consciousness

Swami Vivekananda says, The difference between an ordinary person and an extra ordinary person lies in the degree of attention. In every second our mind can process 150 bits of information(hypothetically). People who have extra ordinary ability to focus use 80-90% of that and put it into the object of focus. Normal people use 30-40% of it and rest of the focus is scattered. Like if we want to read a book, our mind is paying some part of attention on reading, little to checking mobile, social media, little on music, little on our surroundings. As a result the person may be happy with his activities, but actually he is losing focus. We are in the epidemic of distraction. 

The only thing that prevents us from being the Buddha is we cannot meditate like him, mind is always distracted. If only we could calm our minds. Imagine our mind as a bowl of water, if we want the water to be still how careful you have to be. Notice our breathe while the mind is calm, and when we are stressed or angry the breathing is much faster. The whole science of pranayama breathing is you can withdraw the mind from a dozen different things and focus it on the object of concentration.

The quality of life depends on what you pay attention to and how much you pay attention to it. Man in his own place can make a heaven out of hell and a hell out of heaven.

3. Selflessness

Only having a high level of concentration is not sufficient without heart. A person without heart, without love and sensibility, without sensitivity is a Daemon. What is spirituality? when I close my eyes I find peace within and when I open my eyes my attitude should be what can I do for you. Swami Vivekananda said, in the long run unselfishness is more paying but it takes a mature mind to understand that. We may think when we will have more money, more power then we will donate, its a natural thought. But practically what happens, when you get more, you want more and more for yourself. Desires are never ending. Desires are only about me, always. Be a volunteer, a volunteer means someone who is doing something willingly, without any compulsion, neither social, financial, nor something else. If you are doing something willingly it will bring fundamental joy to you, however simple, stupid or idiotic activity it is. I am doing something willingly makes a world of difference. Volunteering means you have no will of your own. You do whatever is needed.

 

Why Krishna teach Gita to Arjun not Duryodhan

One may question, Krishna could have stopped the epic battle of Kurukshetra by making Duryodhana a good being, by teaching him the Gita, not Arjun.

When Krishna approached Duryodhana and said what he is trying to do is Adharma, against morality, the latter said Don't teach me what is right and what is wrong. I know what I am doing is wrong and what should I do to make it right. That was not my problem, the actual problem is I like what I am doing and cannot stop myself from doing the bad things. I know who I am and will continue to do this. There is some force inside, that drives me doing these, I cannot control myself.

Similarly Arjun had a similar query to Krishna, he was also talking about the same force that is inside us. He said, please teach me how can I control myself, how can I be better, how can I follow the path of morality, how can I walk into the path of goodness, the path of God. He also has the same force and with that he is trying to do the right things always. 

This difference makes him the Hero of Mahabharata and Duryodhana the epic villain. The willingness to change is the most important for walking the path of Spirituality.

4 Kinds of Thoughts

Thoughts are of various types: first, thoughts regarding the existing environment; second, thoughts regarding past environment; third, thoughts without environment; and fourth, fantastic thoughts.
Seated int the examination hall, the students think only about their question papers. These are all thoughts concerning the existing environment.
A student who once stood first in class, but who later fails in his examinations, sighs and remembers his achievements of the past. These are thoughts concerning past environment.
The third is thoughts having no environment. When someone is suffering, then he paints brightly dreams and launches imaginary balloons in his mind.
When people mentally combine some part or whole of an entity, with a part or whole of another entity, and then with a part or whole of still another entity - and by blending all these component parts, create an altogether new entity in their imagination, this is called "fantastic thought". Students, who do not want to labour hard to acquire knowledge, imagine a God bestowing knowledge on them.  
Whatever people see in imagination or think, the materials of these thoughts are all collected from the external world. People cannot think of anything which they have not previously seen or perceived with their sense organs. 

Good Intentions bring Good Results

If you pray with the intention of doing good to someone, your prayer may bring about good both to him and to yourself.
All prayers with a motive fall short of the ideal prayer which is without motive.
For most persons, outer ceremonies and rituals are necessary to approach to God. However, they are neither essential nor necessary. They have no lasting value.
Some prayers contain an element of asking from God, either material or spiritual.
In fact, God is so merciful that even without their asking he always gives more than we can receive. He knows our real needs more deeply than we do. Therefore, the element of asking from God is superfluous.
The ideal prayer to God is: You praise Him, not in the spirit of bargain.

5-Fs in Life

Be Friendly, Fair, Frank, Firm and Flexible, the 5-F zone to follow in life. 
Position yourself in such a way that you do not become a victim of finding out who is right and who is wrong. It is not to decide who is wrong but to see what is right. Learn to be confident and learn to connect the 5 dots.
I came across many people who deny, and denial is a big problem. This inner denial makes them psychologically deaf and this inner deafness they try to defend. One has to try to communicate in different ways and make them hear. This is the challenge of the relationship. When a relationship has no challenge, then there is no fun. So have fun with your challenge.
People have not learnt the joy of being simple. Be simple, simplify life and then one can see life is as space to grow not merely age. One become a victim of habits. Then habits take over. 
Simplify life and see peace is fulfilling your life.